You've been hoping for a few years that things will get better. You feel as washed out most days as the scrubs you wear. And wow, you really hoped that new role would revive you.

 

The hardest bit is the feelings of confusion over midwifery, something you wanted to do, and worked so hard for. What others don't realise is how your identity is tied up with being a midwife; and that your dream of working at your best still sits in your pocket, humming away, even on the worst of days. 

 

You wonder whether, when it comes down to it, you're just not cut out for this - whether its work on the wards or trying to lead a team in trying times.

 

You've tried so hard to make it work - changing your hours, your team, maybe even your workplace. Maybe when its just too much you've been numbing it out, with drink or food or endless social media. And you just can't seem to shake the flatness or calm the anxiety. You've drunk the kool-aid on self care, taking it on yourself where you can to try to feel better, live better, make it better. 

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And the reason it doesn't work is that there is a bigger story here, a hushed-up map you haven't been shown. There are names for the way you feel, and what you experience in your day to day. They are out there in the research. Other professions  - even in healthcare - seem to be able to talk more easily about psychological challenge using a language, a way of understanding what it means for your body and brain to be exposed to a daily terrain of difficult decision making, trauma, burnout, and the ‘bone-tired’ fatigue they bring.

 

As midwives without the map and the language we are lost. 

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The good news is this: there is a guidebook at hand, to be used individually, in trusted pairs or in small groups, to enable you rediscover your mojo, to stay in midwifery in a way that works, or to actively choose to leave.  Yes, I said it. 

 

And don’t panic. I understand that the last thing you want to do after a 13 hour shift is read or listen to a book about midwifery hardships. As Flourish guides you in part I onto the oxygen-starved, overwhelming heights of the ‘mega mountains’, there is respite and hope, even there: sections asking ‘What if…?’, invite you to take a deep breath from the oxygen canister and reimagine how we might collectively take small, powerful steps to work and communicate differently. Part II brings a feeling of stable ground and a sense of clarity about who you are and your purpose as a midwife. It will also give you a backpack full of strategies, tools, mindsets and resets, first for survival in the in the day to day, and then for choosing well on the road ahead. The most exciting thing about this work of discovery is that it will serve you throughout your career and in every corner of your life. Grieve, Breathe, Step Back and Reimagine…

 

Who am I to take you on this journey – to reunite role with soul?

 

Good question. I’m glad you asked.

 

I get it because I’ve been there with you – on the wards, in the middle of the night, sobbing with a peer in a blood-spattered sluice; wondering if I’m just not tough enough, young enough, mad enough, hard enough to go on like this. I’ve experienced the fall-out from colleagues’ emotional shut down and self-preservation caused by successive waves of covid. And I know that’s not where it started. 

 

I know too that for you it might be high time you rediscovered yourself – in all your fullness. That you might be thinking that yourself.  I have found joy in my 15 years of coaching work reconnecting people to their values and sense of self, enabling them to see themselves as creative, resourceful and pioneering in their chosen work. I want to live in a world where you have found your ‘place’ in the world, and in developing your voice and knowing your purpose, you too can begin to agitate for change. You can read more about me here.

 

 

 

Go to @wildrubiescoach and post a picture of you reading it to be in with a chance of winning a free coaching session.

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